What normal crying in newborns looks like
When your baby cries and you have tried everything, it is easy to wonder whether something is wrong. Most newborn crying is normal and follows predictable patterns that have nothing to do with how well you are caring for your baby.
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Crying is your baby's first language
Newborns cry because they have no other way to tell you what they need. A cry can mean hunger, a wet nappy, tiredness, being too hot or too cold, or simply wanting to be held. In the first few weeks, crying is the main way your baby communicates, and it is supposed to get your attention.
It helps to think of crying as a signal, not a problem to solve instantly. Sometimes you will figure out the cause straight away. Other times you will try feeding, changing, winding, rocking and nothing seems to work. That is common and it does not mean you are missing something.
The normal crying curve
Healthy newborns cry for between one and four hours a day in total, spread across the day and night. Crying tends to increase from about two weeks old, peak around six to eight weeks, then gradually decrease. This pattern happens across cultures and is not caused by anything a parent does wrong.
You might notice that crying is more frequent in the late afternoon and evening. This is sometimes called the "witching hour" and many babies have a fussy period at the same time each day. It can feel relentless, but it is a normal part of development.
What colic actually means
Colic is a word used when a healthy baby cries for more than three hours a day, for more than three days a week, for longer than three weeks. It is not a diagnosis of a medical problem. It is a description of a pattern.
Babies with colic may cry as if they are in pain, pull their legs up, arch their back, and be hard to settle. The cause is not fully understood. It may relate to an immature digestive system, sensitivity to stimulation, or simply the baby's temperament. Colic usually resolves on its own by three or four months.
If your baby has colic, you are not failing. The crying is not your fault and it is not a sign that your baby is ill. It is a difficult phase that passes.
What you can try when crying feels overwhelming
No single technique works every time, but these are worth trying, one at a time:
- Feed again, even if it has been a short time. Some babies need small, frequent feeds.
- Check the nappy and whether the baby is too hot or too cold.
- Hold your baby upright and gently rub or pat their back. Trapped wind can cause discomfort.
- Rock, sway or walk with your baby. Motion is calming for many newborns.
- Use white noise or a steady shushing sound close to the ear. This mimics the womb.
- Offer a dummy or let the baby suck on your finger if they are not hungry.
- Swaddle your baby firmly in a light blanket, keeping their arms inside.
- Take them outside for a few minutes. A change of air can sometimes shift the mood.
If nothing works and you have been trying for a while, it is okay to put the baby down safely in their cot and step away for five minutes. Take a breath, have a glass of water, and come back when you feel calmer. A crying baby is safer in a cot alone than in your arms if you are becoming frustrated.
Warning signs that need a doctor
Most crying is normal, but some signs deserve a call to your GP or health visitor:
- The cry sounds weak, very high-pitched, or different from usual.
- Your baby is difficult to wake or seems floppy.
- Your baby has a fever, is vomiting, or has not had a wet nappy for six hours.
- The crying is constant and you cannot settle them at all for many hours.
- Your baby is not gaining weight or is feeding poorly.
- You notice a bulge in the groin or belly button that might be a hernia.
Trust your instinct. If you feel something is wrong, it is better to check. A healthcare professional can listen to the baby and put your mind at rest.
How crying affects parents
Living with a crying baby is exhausting. Sleep deprivation makes everything harder. You may feel guilty, angry, or numb. These feelings are not a sign that you are a bad parent. They are a sign that you are human.
If you have a partner, take turns. If you are on your own, accept any help offered. A friend who holds the baby for an hour while you shower is doing real, practical good. The NHS has guidance on looking after your own mental health as a new parent.
Some parents find that persistent crying triggers feelings that remind them of their own difficult childhood. If that resonates, it can help to talk to a therapist who understands the early parenting period. Therapy O'Clock has a professionals directory where you can find someone qualified in perinatal mental health. Your GP or local children's centre can also point you to support.
When crying is part of a bigger picture
For most babies, crying is just crying. But if your baby is older than four months and still crying for hours every day, or if you notice they are not smiling, not making eye contact, or not responding to sounds, it is worth mentioning to your health visitor or doctor. Early help for developmental concerns can make a real difference.
Some parents worry that their baby's intense crying might be a sign of a sensory or processing difference. That is possible, but it is rarely something you can tell in the first few months. For now, focus on what you can see: feeding, sleeping, nappies, and comfort.
If you are also caring for an older child who is struggling, you might find it helpful to read about anxiety in children: signs and how parents can help. The stress of a new baby can affect siblings in ways that look like behaviour problems but are really about needing attention.
You do not have to enjoy every moment
There is a lot of pressure to feel grateful and fulfilled all the time as a new parent. The reality is that some parts of early parenthood are boring, frustrating, and lonely. That is true whether you are an accountant in Vancouver working from home with a screaming baby on your lap, or a nurse in Dubai coming off night shifts to a baby who has been crying all morning.
The crying phase ends. It ends for nearly everyone. In the meantime, you only need to keep the baby safe and fed. You do not need to be happy about the crying. You just need to get through it.
Related guides
- ERP therapy for OCD: how exposure and response prevention works
- Teenage mental health: signs your teen is struggling
Questions people ask
How do I tell the difference between a hungry cry and a tired cry?
A hungry cry is usually rhythmic and short, with a rising and falling pitch. A tired cry is often lower and more whiny, and the baby may rub their eyes or yawn. With time, you will start to notice the pattern for your own baby.
Is it possible to spoil a newborn by holding them too much?
No. Newborns cannot be spoiled. Responding to crying builds trust and security. In the first few months, holding your baby when they cry is exactly what they need.
How long does colic usually last?
Colic typically starts around two to three weeks, peaks at six to eight weeks, and resolves by three to four months. It rarely continues past five months.
Should I change my diet if I am breastfeeding and the baby cries a lot?
Some babies react to certain foods in their mother's diet, but this is less common than people think. Before cutting out foods, check with a doctor or lactation consultant. Eliminating whole food groups without guidance can affect your nutrition.
Can a baby cry so much that they hurt themselves?
No. Crying does not cause physical harm. A baby can cry until they are hoarse, but they will not injure themselves. If you are worried about the sound of the cry, record it and show your health visitor.
Why does my baby cry more when I am holding them than when my partner does?
Babies can smell and sense their mother's milk and may cry more because they expect feeding. This is not personal. It means your baby knows you are the source of food.
Is it normal for my baby to cry every time I put them down?
Yes. Many newborns want to be held constantly. They do not yet understand that you will come back. This phase passes as they develop object permanence, usually around six to eight months.
What if I am getting angry at my baby for crying?
It is normal to feel frustrated. If you feel anger rising, put the baby down in a safe place and walk away for a few minutes. Call a friend or a helpline. The Samaritans are available in the UK and Ireland at samaritans.org. You are not a bad parent for feeling this way.
How do I know if the crying is due to reflux?
Reflux often looks like crying shortly after feeds, with possetting or milk coming back up. The baby may seem uncomfortable lying flat. If you suspect reflux, see your GP. Do not buy over-the-counter reflux medicines without advice.
Can swaddling make crying worse?
For most babies, swaddling is calming. But a few babies dislike being restricted and will cry more. If your baby fights the swaddle, try a sleep sack or just a light blanket tucked loosely.
My baby only cries when I try to put them to sleep. Is that normal?
Very common. Many babies cry when they are overtired but cannot settle themselves. The cry is a protest against being put down, not a sign of pain. Try a consistent bedtime routine: feed, bath, book, then bed.
When should I take my baby to the doctor for crying?
If the cry sounds different, your baby has a fever, is not feeding, or you have a gut feeling that something is wrong. Trust that instinct. It is better to be told it is nothing than to miss a real problem.